Mr. Robson and the Princess
“You should try one of these sundaes,” said Mr. Smiths.
Miss Joan nodded in agreement.
“I’ll get around to it,” Mr. Robson replied as he looked across the large Dairy Center tent. The three teachers were at their school’s Back to School Fair. It had grown into a major annual event, sort of a mini county fair.
“What are you staring at, Mr. Robson?” asked Miss Joan.
“I think I’ll stroll over there and talk to the County Dairy Princess,” Mr. Robson replied.
“She is beautiful,” Mr. Smiths remarked.
“I hadn’t noticed,” said Mr. Robson, trying not to smile.
Miss Joan rolled her eyes.
“Actually, my interest in her is purely professional,” Mr. Robson stated. “I might learn something about the dairy industry that I can share with my fourth graders.”
Mr. Smiths broke in, “Besides, he likes that new resource teacher, Miss Cherry.”
“Miss Cherry is kind of cute,” Mr. Robson admitted. “I like the way her eyes cross when she’s annoyed.”
“Why is it that you know how everyone looks when they’re annoyed?” Miss Joan asked.
Mr. Robson chose to ignore the question. “I’ll be right back,” he said as he walked toward the dairy princess.
Miss Joan and Mr. Smiths relaxed on a bench as they enjoyed their sundaes and watched Mr. Robson approach the princess.
Mr. Robson and the young lady seemed to be having a pleasant conversation when suddenly the princess walked away with a much less than pleasant expression on her face.
When Mr. Robson rejoined his friends, Miss Joan could not contain herself. “I’d give a million dollars to know what you said to her!” she exclaimed.
“You don’t have a million dollars,” Mr. Robson responded.
“I’ll buy you one of these giant hot fudge sundaes for the story,” Mr. Smiths proposed.
“Deal!” said Mr. Robson. “I was asking her what qualities the judges look for in choosing a dairy princess.”
“And?” Miss Joan demanded.
“Well it just goes to prove that a sense of humor isn’t one of the requirements,” Mr. Robson replied.
“What did you say?” Miss Joan asked with that “What terrible thing have you done?” look that she did so well.
“Just to add a little levity to the conversation,” Mr. Robson went on, “I asked her if looking like a cow was one consideration.”
“You did what?!” Miss Joan practically screamed.
“I think this is worth a double hot fudge sundae!” Mr. Smiths announced.
“I thought she’d know I was kidding,” Mr. Robson stated. “I say stuff like that to my students all the time and they know I’m kidding.”
“That’s because they’ve learned not to take you seriously,” Miss Joan said.
“Well this girl, who’s at least twice the age of my fourth graders, ought to know that she doesn’t look anything like a cow. You can’t win a competition to be a princess of any kind without knowing that you’re smart and good looking.”
“Maybe she thinks that you think that she looks like a cow,” Mr. Smiths offered.
“Why would she care?” Mr. Robson countered.
“Good question,” said Miss Joan. “But don’t you see the damage you’ve done?” she added.
“Damage, what damage?” asked Mr. Robson.
“Up until today she was a self-confident young woman, destined for greatness. She might have become a scientist whose inventions would have saved millions of lives. She might have gone on to be a great leader who would bring peace and prosperity to the whole world!” Miss Joan paused to catch her breath. “But now,” she continued, “she’ll spend the rest of her miserable existence hiding her face. She’ll live her entire life wearing a character costume at some amusement park so that no one will ever gaze upon her cowlike features! And needless to say, she’ll never save the world!”
“You could just go over there and apologize,” Mr. Smiths suggested.
“That might just make things worse,” said Mr. Robson. “In a few minutes she’ll forget I exist; she’ll forget what I said, and she can go on to save the world.”
“I’ll have my sundae now,” Mr. Robson reminded Mr. Smiths. “Didn’t I hear ‘double hot fudge’?”
As Mr. Smiths walked off to buy the sundae, Mr. Kay, the principal, came by. “Mr. Robson,” he said, “I have a nice surprise for you. I’ve lined up your student teacher for this fall. Her name is Miss Lee. She’s already a very accomplished young lady. In fact, you may have noticed her at the fair.”
“She’s here? I’d like to meet her,” said Mr. Robson.
“That’s her over there,” Mr. Kay said. “She’s wearing that shiny little crown.”
“You mean that Dairy Princess crown?” asked Mr. Robson.
“That’s her,” said Mr. Kay.
Miss Joan, who couldn’t help hearing the conversation, had a broad smile on her face. Mr. Robson was not smiling.
“Excuse me,” said Mr. Robson, “I have to rush to my room and prepare a lesson plan!”
“A lesson plan?” asked the principal.
“Yes,” sighed Mr. Robson, “A lesson about thinking before speaking.”